It was many years ago when we met, you and IYou lived with your family on the Baldwin Park street
we moved to, we being Bris, the kids and I .
We were all so young then...Bris was 39, I was 34, our kids,
Linda, Dwight and Candy were 15, 13 1/2 and almost 11 .
You were just 18, a young wife and mother of a 10-month old,
Michael.
You kids all became friends very quickly, but I was too shy
to go and meet you all.
Later, when Mike had his first birthday party, our kids went and
told us about how you let Mike dive into that cake, and what a mess
he made. I thought that was awful ! Never had heard of
letting a baby make such a mess. Pretty uptight, me !
You kids would come to our house, only 2 houses away,
and make yourselves to home, while I sort-of hid in
the bedroom. I was always like that, dumb, I now know.
Anyway, you guys kept coming, day after day, and I
finally decided that I couldn't stay hidden in that bedroom
forever, so came out to be with everybody.
It was hard for me, at first, but after a while, you
were pretty much like our own .
Your Mom and I became best friends, and I so enjoyed
her company. She was very unlike me, but we got
along really well.
Imagine my shock when she told me that she
had the boys doing 'girl' chores, like dishes, laundry
and ironing, etc.
That floored me, b/c I had
always believed in the traditional roles
for boys and girls. Boys did things like
taking out the trash, mowing the lawn, helping Dad
with car repairs, and learning how to change
tires, etc. Girls did dishes, sewing, laundry, ironing, etc.
Your Mom opened my eyes, and taught me a few things !
Somewhere along the way, I learned that she and
your Dad had recently lost two children, 3-month old
Jerry, and Susie's 3-year old twin, Sandy.
There were seven of you then, and as we got to know
each of you, and your personalities, we liked you all
so much. You wormed your way into our hearts,
and it was that way with your Mom, Carol, too.
She treated our kids just like her own.
And, so it was, that we each had 10 kids.
Bris and I would take one or another of you camping
up to Mammoth, or to Goleta Beach, down by Santa Barbara,
and to other places, too.
You had two other babies by then, Billy, then
Pat, and we would go to Goleta, babies and all,
and Linda would help you with the babies, changing,
feeding, and playing with them.
I just pretty much sat on a blanket on the sand,
and watched everyone swimming, etc. There
were times when I'd dig up clams, pick up
pretty little stones and sea-shells, while you all
were either swimming, playing with babies, etc.
Some of the time I spent cooking over the little
BBQ pit, or making sandwiches, etc.
Then I'd wash what dishes there were.
Some of the kids would go for a swim, with
Bris supervising. He could swim...I couldn't, so
he was the logical one to watch over all of them.
It was so funny, to see little skinny April, with her
bathing suit hanging on her little body. Bris took
at least one picture of her, walking on the beach, with
a towel draped around her, after coming out of
the water. She was so thin back then.
That beach, Goleta, had other interesting
things to do. there was an airport where we
could watch planes take off and land, just
private planes, Piper cubs, etc.
This was mostly Bris's thing. the kids and
I weren't that thrilled with it.
There were also some cows grazing right next
to the beach.
University of California at Santa Barbara was
right there. we could see the college from there
on the beach.
Little did we know that years later, Candy and Reggie's
son, Micah, would be attending that very college !!
We also could walk to the town of Goleta to buy
groceries or takeout from the big Taco Bell right
there in the center of town, or anything else we needed.
Sometimes we'd go barefooted to shop in the town.
We loved that beach and the town, and we'd go
often.
It was so little used, that we felt like it was our
very own, private beach !
Went on that way for years, and then, after a
period of not going for a while, were we
surprised to see it had been discovered by
some other people, and after a short time, it
was overrun by folks, just like any other beach !
Never found another beach like that one.
So sad.
But we had Mammoth, and Seal Beach, and our
long, country drives to places like the town of
Arlington, right next to Riverside, I think it was.
Wherever we went, we had either you and
the babies, or some of your siblings...think
we nearly always had a Teague or two
with us.
Once we went to a town with a pier, and one
of the souvenir shops had two large shells
outside, on either side of the doorway.
Well, Candy and Susie each sat in one
of those shells, and Bris took a picture of them.
They looked so cute !
Wonder whatever happened to that snapshot ?
Maybe that year when Candy and Linda
decided to make you that special album
for your birthday, or maybe Mothers' Day,
and I gathered up all the pictures of your kids
that I could find for that album, the one of
Candy and Susie sitting in those shells might
have been one that I gave them for that.
After all, you had a lot to do with Susie's
upbringing, so it would have been the natural
thing to do.
You helped your Mama a lot in that
respect, being mother to your sibs
some of the time.
You followed in your Mom's footsteps, for a time,
doing nursing care for the elderly. You learned
a lot in that time, and was able to help all
of us whenever we had some health problem
or other. All we had to do was ask, and you
usually knew just the right thing to say or do
to help us.
It was so neat, how all you kids came
together, and we all pretty much
functioned as one family !
I used to think that Dwight and April would
end up together, Richard and Candy would
be a couple ( then, later, I thought Donald
and Candy ) would join up.
Linda was crazy for Vinny, and I thought
they might wind up together.
Well, none of those pairings took place, and
in the early 70's, you and Dwight got
together. That was a surprise, to me, anyway.
I thought April had her sights set on him !
After some years, you and Dwight went to Las Vegas
and got married and raised your kids together.
Both you and Dwight became ill later on,
and you guys had to struggle to find the strength
to raise three very active boys . Besides your health
issues, you were plagued by financial problems.
Life became very hard, but you both kept
plugging away, and got the boys raised despite
the hardships.
You guys bought a mobile home in Tehachapi
right by the mountains. You both loved it there
in that beautiful setting. Had a fire there, but
bounced back from that. Stayed a while longer,
then you moved to Oregon
and lived there for some time.
Some years later, you came back to
California, the Northern area, and settled
down in Stockton, where Bill and his
family had bought a home.
Bad health continued to plague both
of you, and you guys were in and out
of hospitals .
You, Linda, had a hernia procedure at the very
beginning of 1993. That became infected,
and you had another operation to correct
that. But, it didn't, and you had to endure
yet another operation. One after another,
making a total of either 5 or 6 surgeries
in all, for that one hernia.
Then, you developed another hernia, right
on top of the original one, which still
wasn't fixed !! You went for years, suffering
with the two hernias, until about 9 months ago,
when you had surgery for one of them.
You came out of that surgery with flying colors.
Whenever you and I spoke on the phone, you
had really changed. Your voice had a lilt to
it, and you seemed genuinely happy, for
the first time in years. I could almost see
and hear you singing, smiling broadly.
Your whole mood was one of peace and joy.
You laughed easily...you were on the road
to better health than you'd had in years !
You were like the old Linda, of the
twinkling brown eyes, the sparkling
personality, the friend we used to have,
in whom we could confide.
September came, and with it, devastation,
and hopelessness, as the hernia became infected
and one thing led to another, and sadly,
inexcusably, you were torn from the bosom
of your family, gone too soon, due to negligence
and human fallibility !!
We all have lost someone dear to us, someone
we will miss beyond mere physical presence, we
will miss your smiling face, your unfailing
optimism, no matter what would happen. I feel
this wonderful thing happened with you,
after you found God, and let Him into your life.
That is what gave you the courage to go
through the second hernia surgery, confident
that it would take care of the problem, once
and for all time.
That didn't happen, and we have lost a
great friend. Yes, you were a friend to all
of us...kids, husband, grandkids, siblings.
We miss you now and will miss you always .
You were a big part of our lives.
I love you, and everyone in our huge
family loves and misses you.
We have a large hole in our hearts, that can only
be filled when we re-unite on the other side.
Thank you for being a part of my life.
Your mother-in-law, and your friend.
Dot
