Deep in our psyches
Secrets
Some very dark secrets
Buried deep inside
Where we don't have to
Look at them
Some for which we feel
So much shame
As to make us feel
Unworthy of others
Unworthy of love
Unworthy of even
Deserving to live
Vilifying ourselves
Allowing others to
Vilify us
Feeling we deserve it
The outward effects
Diminish our lives
Keeping us depressed
Confused, wondering
Not knowing
Why we have these feelings
Are there sins we committed
Or that others committed
Upon us
Deeds we omitted
Wondering why so many
things in life seem to go
Wrong
We need to dig deep, find
The demons, uncover the
Secrets
Bring them to the surface
To our conscious mind
Where we can look at them
And allow ourselves to
Feel the hate, disgust
Revulsion
Allow the tears of frustration,
Anger, sorrow, regret
All, to come out and
Deal with them
Come to the realization
That we are only, after all,
Human beings, with all
the vagaries of humanness
To control us
feeling shame, disgust and
Fear of being found out
So, we bury these
Secrets, experiences, memories
Down deep, along with
The emotions we felt
At the time
Keeping us from living life
to it's fullest, diminishing
Our joys and happiness
If never resolved
We will continue to
Experience
Our own private
Agony
I just penned this on february 15th, 2011. It had been rolling around in
ReplyDeletemy mind for a while, but waited for what I thought would be the right time.
Now seems to be that time.
Since I forgot to leave my 'signature', I do it now.
D
Nana it brings to mind day break when I read this. I love it!
ReplyDeleteThis is your niece, Sue. I'm hacking Candy's account. :)
ReplyDeleteThis really hit home, so much that I think you had me in mind when you penned it. You used to listen to me when I was a teen and it was a great comfort knowing someone really cared for me and saw good in me when no one else did.It was tough growing up and being told you were worthless, no one would ever love you and told by parents they wished you had never been born, but you saw something in me that my parents never did and I thank you from the bottom of my heart. You gave me strength and made me feel special and loved. Thank you and I love you Aunt Dot. By the way it's a great poem!!!!!
So, this is really me, Candy, now.
ReplyDeleteYou continue to impress me with your words and ability to put them on paper in a way that inspires not only me, but many others. Keep writing, Mom. I love reading your stuff. This is a particularly poignant piece.