MEMORIES ON FILM

Today my niece, Sue, posted a picture

of my late father, Edward C. Boyden.

I had seen this pic only once before,

when Sue had made DVD's for each of

her cousins and me, of her Mom,

Anne A. Hadfield on some occasion.

I don't think that was a birthday DVD,

but could be wrong.

Anyway, Sue had included this picture

of her grandfather on that DVD. When I

viewed that DVD, it evoked a chuckle,

but today, upon seeing it here on

Facebook, I said, "That's my Daddy",

and burst into tears !!

Why the strong reaction ? I don't

really know, unless it's related to the fact

that my big sister just passed on Memorial

Day, just 9 days ago, and that is still very

fresh in my mind.

I've been having those

thoughts that I think most folks have

when they lose someone as close as a

sibling . You know, thinking, 'I'll have to

ask Anne', or 'I'm going to call Anne

to tell her' something. Or a book or TV

show you want to discuss with her, or

want to ask her about how to make

some dish you want to eat,

temporarily forgetting that she's

no longer here to talk to.

Maybe because of that so recent loss

of my beloved sister, Anne,

the picture of my father brought

a renewed sense of loss, and the

tears were just barely below the surface,

ready to erupt at any time.

It was sweet of Sue to post this one

of my Dad, and I thank her for it.

Made me very happy to see him.

She has been going through her Mom's

old pictures, letters and cards, and

posting some pictures on F/B that I've never

even seen before. I love that, and hope

she keeps on doing it.

That way, too, some family members,

who never got to meet their ancestors

can see what they looked like. I hope

all these younger relatives enjoy seeing

their great-grandparents, and great

aunts and uncles, etc.

So, thanks to Sue Hall, we all can

enjoy these lovely and some funny

family pictures.

Thank you, sweetheart...keep posting !

I love you, loved your Mom, and love

seeing these pictures. Please put more

and more, as you come across them.

D

THE LAW OF ATTRACTION

Am I happy ?

Yes, I'm as happy as I allow myself to be.

Do I not have any worries or concerns ?

Of course I do, but will not allow myself

to become down-hearted and depressed.

It doesn't help, but impedes my thinking,

my hope that things will get better.

I refuse to let the worries I have

about my family's health problems

get me down .

Rather, I subscribe to the school

of thought that things will improve,

draw towards us that which we desire,

in this case, happiness, and better health.

Is it possible to be happy in this

crazed, greedy, corrupt, war-torn

world ?

I say, Yes, but it will take work,

concentration, focus to bring about

the atmosphere with which I,

or we, desire to surround ourselves.

Diligence in watching our thought

patterns can bring this about.

But, neglecting to maintain the

positive atmosphere, can make the

Law of Attraction work just the

opposite, and bring about that which

we do not want, that which we fear

and in which we despair. Those things

will be attracted to us; the very things

we want to put out of our lives.

It takes strength and determination

to remain steadfast in attracting

what we want in our lives. We

can't let our thoughts flit about

willy-nilly, if we want any measure

of control, any measure of

peace of mind.

We must guard against those

destructive thoughts of

unworthiness, self-pity, and worry

asserting themselves again,

if we ever hope to have what

we want in our lives, some measure

of happiness and contentment.

So, yes, it is possible to be

relatively happy, but we must

work towards that end.

A field lying fallow

does not produce anything,

but a field that is enriched with

the necessary nutrients, and

worked on daily, diligently, will

produce an abundant, luscious crop !

Our minds are those fields, and

if we daily feed it good, positive

thoughts, we will see an abundance

of joy and contentment.

And that should make us happy.

Please, all of you, count the blessings

you have now, and be content.

I love each and every one of you,

my super-large family. You all

are very special to me.

D

THE SEARCH

"Will true Spirit come forward, please?"

Nobody moves.

They all just stand there, some looking down, some staring straight ahead,

yet others watching each other in expectation.

"Who will step forward?"

Again, silence.

After a very long time, a shadowy, dark form moves slowly out of the crowd.

It shuffles toward the speaker.

"No, no, you're not Spirit........you're too dreary; full of sadness and suffering.

I feel much misery in you. Go back.

Another glides forward, smiling provocatively, "Will I do" ? it asks .

"You can't be Spirit. You pursue only pleasure and thrills. Go back to your place.

"Perhaps I'm the one you're looking for". Another has spoken.

It marches forward smartly, in true military fashion, clicking it's heels, as it stops

directly in front of Speaker.

Speaker looks Military up and down, feeling the ugliness of war, hate and killing.

Speaker orders it back.

"Hey, Dude, maybe I'm your guy." Oh boy, this one is even less like Spirit

than the others. As it comes forward in it's filthy garb, it is just finishing a can of beer,

which it casually tosses aside. After an enormous belch, it pops a cigar in it's mouth

and lights it, strutting all the while. As it comes closer, Speaker recoils from the stench,

and tells that one to return.

Another approaches. then another and another, each claiming to be Spirit, until at last,

they have all been seen.

But none of them have the magical child-like essence that only Spirit possesses.

Spirit must be gone, forever.

Speaker is very disheartened, and turns to leave.

But, wait !

A tiny voice is heard, from way in back of the pack, muffled by the density of the crowd.

A hush comes over them.

"Wait", it says. I'm here. I am Truth and Light and Love".

The crowd parts, and a brilliant radiance fills the room, so bright that they have to

shield their eyes.

It steps forward, almost floating, as it moves gracefully towards Speaker.

Speaker knows in his heart that this is true Spirit .

"But where have you been? Where did you go?, Speaker asks.

'I've been so lonely, and have had such an emptiness in me".

"I've been here all the time, but it became so dark and crowded, my light was extinguished,

and I fell asleep. I was hidden under all the misery, ignorance, fear and pretense. But, now,

you have exposed them for what they are, and have taken their power from them.

I've awakened from my sleep, and I'm here to be with you always".

Spirit moves toward Speaker, arms outstretched, and melts right into Speaker's body.

Speaker is at once filled with love, warmth and radiant energy.

"Never again will I allow myself to lose Spirit", he says.

I wrote this on April 10, 1993

There were a couple of lines at the end, that I have left out. They don't seem to fit any more.

This seems to fit in somewhat with my last piece here, I think. Hope you all enjoy it.

I love all of you.

D

FACING THE DARK

Darkness can be frightening

Can't see anything, therefore

one becomes full of fear.

We cannot see in the dark,

unlike animals whose eyes allow

them to see perfectly.

Darkness of the Spirit

is more frightening.

If one embraces that darkness,

he cannot see what is ahead of him,

any more than when there is

artificial light to see by, or any

sunlight to illuminate our Earth,

or moonlight to give a gentle

glow in the evening.

The inner darkness is

all-pervasive; it keeps out,

blocks any light, any hope

of being able to see beyond the dark.

Bad feelings ... hurt, pain, anger,

despair, sadness, confusion, terror,

unworthiness, dread, violence

and loneliness reside in that place.

To embrace darkness is to close

oneself off from light, to choose

to be in that self-imposed prison

from which there may be

no escape, no hope.

If one chooses to wallow in

all that mud of bad feelings,

all that muck, is to condemn

oneself to a life of misery.

There is hope, a way out,

if one chooses to take it, to

escape from that awful prison.

He must face those feelings,

confront each of them, and make

the decision to conquer them,

put them out of existence,

once and for all time.

The darkness is very powerful,

but you are more powerful than

your feelings.

You must gather up your strength

to be able to face down these demons,

Don't let them conquer you !

Examine each one, find it's flaws,

its weaknesses.

You must take control of your

own mind and heart, and

defeat your enemy, those terrible

feelings that have grabbed hold

of you, and don't want to let go.

Feelings are intangible, without

substance. You, your mind, is real,

and only you can pull yourself up

out of the muck and mire of

bad feelings. Only you can

chase those bad feelings away.

Take control, and free yourself

from that cold, damp prison cell.

I hope you will carefully read

these words, and take them to heart.

You MUST take control and stop

letting these rotten feelings run

rampant through your mind and heart.

You CAN do it; others have done it,

and you have to fight hard, every day,

every time one of these negative feelings

comes over you. Stop and look at it, see

how weak it really is, and without your

consent, it really has NO power.

When the next one comes along, do

the same thing. As you do this to each

of them, they will lose whatever power

they have had over you, and you can then,

as the saying goes, 'kick it to the curb'.

It won't be easy, it will take strength

and vigilance to see it coming and

head it off, before it can do any harm.

As each one leaves, replace it with a

positive thought or feeling, and if

you do this consistently, one day, all

those lousy feelings will be a thing

of the past, and you will be full of,

if not actual happiness, at least

contentment, peacefulness, and serenity.

I am praying for you, please do this

for yourself. Never mind what the people

in your life say, their words do not matter.

What you say to yourself, what YOU

think, is what matters.

Take charge of your life, your destiny.

I love you.

D

THE LOST SOUL ?

Oh, no, the soul can not be lost.

It knows exactly where it is,

where it is going and why.

The human, however, CAN be lost,

floundering, not knowing who

he is, where he is, and

where he's going... or how

he is going to get there, or

even WHY he is going.

The human stumbles along,

meeting obstacle after obstacle,

and either learns how to overcome

each one he encounters, or

spends LIFETIMES, trying

to learn how to overcome them.

The human is frail, and can be

easily stumbled or confused,

whereas the soul possesses great

strength, and resources for knowing

who, what, how, where, when and why.

The soul has infinite patience

and can wait as long as necessary

to fulfill it's deep longing to

be 'Home' .

Although we sometimes have to

come back, again and again to

this life, we know that we were

sent here to learn something.

Once the soul becomes human,

it forgets the purpose, the reason

why it came to Earth. There is

a reason, but that reason becomes

lost or confused in the human

brain. It's there, but life's experiences

tend to keep it hidden or in

abeyance until such time as the soul

realizes it has fulfilled its purpose

here on Earth and is ready to go

to its original HOME, to God,

to whom the soul belongs,

there to reside forever in peace,

harmony and love with all it's

fellow souls who have completed

their journeys as well.

I wrote this back in 1995, and just came across

it yesterday. thought it was pretty good,

so decided to post it in hopes that some

of you will enjoy it as well.

Keep counting your blessings, and know that we,

the human race, are all ONE.

I love you.

D

TEENAGERS

What wonderful creatures are teenagers !

They're so complex, yet so

Mysterious .

Really in a category by themselves,

No longer children, yet not adults, either.

They can drive us to distraction, yet at times

Make us weep with joy.

Today, March 27th, 2011, my daughter,

Candy, sent me a group of pictures.

They were of a huge rock in Iowa,

That had been written on for

Generations of teenagers, all

Manner of things, from the simple

'Johnny loves Mary' stuff, to all kinds of

Profanity, etc.

Then, along comes this boy, this

Teenager, who looks at the rock and sees

So much more potential in it.

He brings his paints and brushes and

Sits down, studies this rock for a bit,

Before deciding just how to go about

Presenting his artistry.

He started to paint, and what he

Portrayed on that rock is something that

Will be looked at and talked about for

Years to come.

This teenager, this kid, made the rock

Into a Memorial for all those who serve

In the U.S. armed forces.

I will be sending the pictures to all on

My E-mail list, and hope you all will

Forward it to everyone on your lists.

Next time we think of how badly

Some teens are acting up, please

Give a thought to this boy, who, although

At the time he painted these memorable

Scenes from our country's history, was

Too young to know what war is all about,

Still seemed to have so much love and

Understanding in his heart, for the

Sacrifices made by so many, and made

A glorious Memorial to all those

Who have fought and / or died,

In all the wars in which

Our country has been engaged.

Next time some teenager is giving you a

Hard time, try to listen to them,

Try to see the point they're

Trying to make, try to make some sort of

Compromise, meet them half-way,

And love them as if there's no tomorrow,

Because sometimes there isn't.

Think of this particular boy, and know that

There are so many more, just like him

Who only need to be listened to, and

Understood, and loved, no matter what !

Teenagers truly are wondrous creatures !!

I hope all you parents who read this

will look into your hearts, and realize

how much we all influence our children.

Those of us beyond child-rearing age

can look back and see the mistakes

we made with our own kids, and hope

that today's parents of young kids

will learn from our mistakes and do

a better job of listening to their kids

and help them to become healthier,

better adjusted adults than some of

our kids turned out.

We weren't bad parents, just misguided,

bringing up our kids the only way we

knew ; the way we were brought up.

Whether right or wrong, they and then

we, did the best we could, with the

knowledge and experience we had.

The kids and teens of today have it

really rough, living in an unsure world,

not knowing whether we will have to

fight a war here in our own country,

which could be a possibility, the way

things are going, with so many wrong

choices being made, so much unrest

here and in the rest of the world, so

much fighting for domination and power.

The least we adults can do for these

young people, these teenagers, and even

those a little older, is to listen to their

problems, their grievances, and show

them that we are listening, really,

truly, hearing them, and that they can

count on us to be there for them,

whatever is happening, whatever to them

is so important, even to the boy/girl

dramas, which to them, means so much.

They need to know that we care enough

to listen, to hold them when they are in

anguish, to just sit quietly sometimes,

while they pour out their feelings.

We must, if there is to be any hope

for these precious kids, and for our

nation, which they will be running,

governing, some day in the future.

Remember, we all were teenagers once,

and whether we got what we needed

or not, from the experience, we know

what we felt, what we needed, and we

can call upon those memories, those

feelings, and try to do better with our kids

or grandkids.

We must not dwell upon the mistakes

we made in the past, we just have to

do our best to help our kids NOW.

The past is done and over with, we

have to deal with what is going on

at the present time. Our kids, and we,

ourselves are worth the time and effort.

Let's continue to count our blessings,

today and every day.

I love you all, my dearest ones.

D

SOMETIMES

You know, when I speak to people,

especially those I love, I sometimes

want to get across a point that I feel

needs to be addressed, and think I do

it in such a way as to irritate them.

I sometimes speak a little louder

or use cuss words to emphasize

the point.

I don't mean to hurt anyone's

feelings, but think I do, unintentionally.

Sometimes I feel it's the only way

to make them understand; to feel

the importance of what I'm trying

to bring to their attention.

My voice is not unduly loud, so

sometimes have to raise it

to be heard.

Also, when excited, I sometimes

speak louder than intended, and

people think I'm angry. I'm not,

just so anxious to get the person

to understand what I'm trying to say.

Sometimes, I feel as though

I'll never be heard

unless I raise my voice.

Frustration sometimes

makes me louder.

When I feel someone isn't

really listening, isn't getting

the point I'm trying to make,

it is indeed, frustrating

So, if I've given any of you

the wrong idea, or getting you

upset or angry with me,

please re-think whatever

it is that we talked about,

and realize that I sometimes

come across differently

than was the intention.

I love everyone so much,

and would never do or say

anything to purposely

hurt you, so please realize

that I do get carried away

with my zeal. Sometimes.

I love you all.

D